By Bill Adams
I think some manufacturers introduce new stuff just to confuse old timers and drive us out of the fire stations and into retirement homes. Admittedly, many new products and improvements to existing products have made firefighters’ lives easier and safer. However, the new radio systems being introduced today are a different story. They’re called digital, or multi-trunking, or some other fancy and expensive-sounding name.
My county has gone “digital” away from regular radios—the kind with channels you manually select on a radio or scanner. Why get rid of tubes and crystals if they still work? When I first joined the fire company, the rigs had single-channel radios you manually turned on and off. If left on, they killed the battery—a common occurrence. The company I joined 10 years later had radios with two manually selectable channels; easy to remember: Channel 1 or Channel 2. Even white hairs could figure that one out. Fast forward a couple decades and apparatus radios automatically came on and off with the ignition switch. Most had five (5) channels. For the forgetful there was usually a list Scotch-taped to the dashboard saying which channel to use. And, scanners only scanned the channels that you wanted them to.
I had scanners in my home, vehicles, and office. The fanciest one could scan 20 channels, but I was content with 16. With the new digital-trunking-whatever system, channels are no longer used; everything is a frequency. I’m not an active fireman (that’s what we used to be called) so I don’t care what the new system is called; how it works; or how many frequencies a scanner can monitor. I just want to turn the damn thing on and monitor a dozen or so fire departments. That’s not destined to happen.
Buying a New Scanner
One of the younger actives who dislikes old people recommended a particular model and brand “digital trunking” scanner. There’s no walk-in scanner store, so I had to purchase it online. Communicating via email is challenging. Talking on the telephone is frustrating—even with new hearing aide batteries. I eventually bought the scanner, which cost a good chunk of my social security check. I have a major problem: I can’t get the damn thing to work the way I want it to.
I complained so much about the scanner during morning coffee, one Raisin Squad member called me a curmudgeon. I’ve heard that term before but didn’t know exactly what it meant so I didn’t whine for a while. A couple months later I started moaning and groaning about having to spend a hundred bucks to get the scanner reprogrammed. My antagonist said, “There you go—practicing curmudgeonry again.” I had to look it up to see what this old fool was talking about. Merriam-Webster’s dictionary defines a curmudgeon as a “a crusty, ill-tempered, and usually old man.” It can also be a bellyacher, complainer, crab, grump, and a whiner. The shoe fits; I’ll wear it.
Lack of Communication
The following is a synopsis of conversations I had with sales, technical, repair, and service people (reps):
*I want a scanner to monitor 20 channels. The rep says the scanner has five “sites” and each one has “systems” and “groups” that can receive up to 25,000 channels. I only want to monitor 20. But they come with the scanner he says. I don’t give a rat’s rectum about 25,000 channels. Turn off all but 20. But they’re free. I don’t give a crap. Then he alluded it can be programed to just one county. The nerve of this guy—confusing me with facts.
Can I speak to someone else? I did—to a couple different people. I was frustrated but ended up buying the damn thing.
The scanner had a 130-page owner’s manual about the size of a deck of playing cards. I had to buy a pair of tr